The holidays were quite emotional for me this year because of last year’s experiences.

At Christmas-time 2009, I was my absolute sickest. On Christmas Eve, I was admitted to the hospital for the second time. I had a high fever and I was vomiting blood because of the Mallory-Weiss tears I had developed. I had cardiac issues that precluded me from being transferred to the oncology unit until my heart rate and blood pressure were under control. My red count, white count and platelets had all bottomed out. My oncologist, Dr. L., kept saying, “we just don’t see this with this kind of chemo; it must be the lupus complicating everything.”

Fortunately, as you know, I survived all of that and a few more months of complications, and I am now in complete remission. Yay!  However, when the holiday season rolled around again, I kept having flashbacks to last year. Every time it happened, I felt sick to my stomach and I felt the tears behind my eyes.

But God had a plan. My next-door neighbors have two lovely girls. Their mom began a full-time job two weeks before Christmas. The girls were used to their mom being there when they arrived home from school. Fearing that they might have some difficulty with the transition,  I suggested that they come visit me after school. That went so well that the week before Christmas, when the girls were off school entirely, they spent all afternoon with me each day. We made donuts to give to a friend. We wrapped Christmas presents. We made caramel corn, watched a Christmas movie and worked on the girls’ present for their mom. We made and decorated Christmas cookies. We filled our time with joy, and guess what? The flashbacks stopped! We had a wonderful time. The girls were exactly what I needed, and I was exactly what they needed. I now have new holiday memories, and I think when Christmas rolls around again in 2011, I will be just fine.

Love and joy come to you!  And God bless you and send you a happy new year!!